How to Prevent Academic Burnout in Teens
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How to Recognize Academic Burnout in Teens and how to Help - Episode 068
How To Prevent Academic Burnout In Teens
How can you help your child prevent academic burnout? In school, the definition of a struggle for a child differs a lot. The struggle can come from trying to become valedictorian or join an honors society. The struggle can also be dealing with classes you don’t enjoy, or worse - dislike the teacher. It can mean dealing with ADHD that hasn’t been diagnosed and wondering why you can’t pay the same amount of attention your peers can. It can be low grades, anxiety, or perfectionism.
Academic struggle can take multiple forms. Just because someone looks like they’re doing well, it doesn’t mean they are. They could still be scared, worried, and going through lots of frustration because of school.
The truth is, it’s easy to get academic burnout.
How Struggling Students Experience Burnout
I see this in my academic coaching practice with students who are trying to make a comeback. They have been steadily getting good grades and doing assignments on time, only to have more assignments thrown at them. To them, it feels they can’t find the time to even breathe properly.
Usually, a scenario like this leads to missing a few assignments, getting even lower grades, and in some cases, even a rough arguments with their teacher. When you’ve been trying so hard only to make some unexpected mistakes, the desire to give up is strong. It simply does not feel worth your time anymore.
These students forget all about the good points they have gathered up over the weeks, all the times they have succeeded, and end up focusing on a little setback.
They have worked hard, and they have done so well only to feel all of it slip away. The defeat is all too apparent in their faces. They don’t think there is a way out of the situation. They assume this is their life, where they have to fight for everything.
They think life is never going to be more relaxed again.
We must address this issue…
How to Talk about Academic Burnout with your Teen
We need to talk about all of it. We need to talk about the good things, the things they have accomplished but we also need to talk about the frustration they are experiencing.
How difficult it can be to keep up with so many things happening one after another. Especially for students whose nature doesn’t allow them to tackle multiple things such as the ones with ADHD. Students with attention deficit disorder indeed find it harder than their peers.
How do we deal with it? How do we make it better?
Learning to Embrace Struggle at School
Sometimes, we simply can’t do anything. Sometimes we need to leave it at the fact that this was bound to happen. That when you are working too hard on so many things, you are bound to mess up somewhere. What your child needs to remember is that despite all the slip-ups, it’s not going to take away what they have already achieved.
Setbacks are a part of life. Your child is only human. They need to know that even while they are trying hard, it’s completely normal to make some mistakes. As long as they don’t let their one mistake define their entire being, they will be fine in life.
If your child is struggling at school, as a parent, your job isn’t to only show up when they are doing well. You have to be there when they are going through a rough patch too. You have to help them through their failures and frustrations.
Sometimes, all your child wants is someone to acknowledge the awesome parts of them. Maybe they have been dealing with criticism so long that they want some confirmation that they aren’t a failure.
Even as an adult, no one always tells us we are doing well. But as a kid, it’s needed. But we also need to help our children learn that it’s normal to face criticism. What matters is how we learn to deal with it, that we don’t let it define us, and find the strength to bounce back from it.
If your child is going through something like this, where they were doing well in school and getting everything in order, only to slip up here and there, it is up to you to have a conversation with them. Ask your child how they are. There is a good chance they’re dealing with academic burnout.
Give them a platform to vent. Let them know they can have a conversation with you about their struggles without any judgment.
Also, let them know that you do see their hard work. That you can see they are trying. Find ways to celebrate their accomplishments with them.
Be honest with them about your feelings, as well. Let them know you are going to mess up too. You aren’t always going to remember the good things your child has done because, as a parent, it can get too easy to focus on the part where they are falling behind in school.
Think about it yourself. How can you make your child feel better? How can you provide support to them in their hard times?
When your child is doing well, and you’re busy celebrating their progress, only to face a situation where they slip-up, if your first reaction is to question them aggressively, it does nothing but hurt them. From their point of view, they are trying their best as well, but it never seems enough.
In Closing
Balance is essential. If we are bringing up their struggles and failures, we also need to tell them that it is normal to mess up. We then need to highlight the positive work they have put in an acknowledge that school can become overwhelming at times.
A little support can go a long way in helping your child deal with academic burnout. We dive into ways to help your child in The Parent Lab. It’s my membership to help parents who are struggling with how to help their children thrive at school and maintain their relationship with their child in the process. Want to join the waitlist? Click here
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Highlights
Recognizing burnout in students
How to help your child when they are burned out at school
Talking about academic stress
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Marni Pasch| Host of School Counselor Gone Rogue| Academic Coach | Team Pasch Academic Coaching
I work with students in grades 6th and higher, who struggle with academic confidence and motivation. I help them survive school with less stress by helping them create concrete goals, tackle procrastination and learn creative study techniques. I empower students to take charge of their education and reach their goals. I do this through individual or group coaching so students achieve success in life, school, career readiness and their social endeavors. I provided in person academic coaching in Orlando, FL, but work with students across the country through Zoom!
